In our hallway hangs a poem.
It’s right above the time out chair.
It wasn’t placed there intentionally, there just happened to be a nail
from the previous owners on that little bit of wall space. As for the time out chair, our oldest and
only at the time, thought the spot was perfect for her great grandmother’s
telephone bench. So the two lined up
perfectly and four years later they still keep each other company.
The poem is something my dad wrote me for my 18th
birthday, the summer before I started college.
The title reads: Magic Years and it tells of my misadventures as a
child. A piece about my roller skating accidents,
melted Popsicles grins, being afraid of thunder and lightning and even a quick tale
of me running into a parked truck on my bicycle. But the last paragraph reads, “If you are as
lucky as your Mother and I there will one day be a child that’s the apple of
your eye and in distant reflections through laughter and tears you too will
discover that magic in those years.”
I remember trying to read it out loud and getting about halfway
through and crying. I couldn’t finish reading
it and had to hand it off to my dad, but he was just as choked up and handed it
off to my mom who had to finish it for us.
You see, my dad and I do our best to hide those emotions, the ones right
on the surface, heaven forbid someone see it as weakness… so we act tougher,
work harder and do our best not to say what’s on our mind for fear we’ll look
weak behind our tears. It’s easier to
write it down and save the tears for private.
Daddy says it’s the Irish in us.
Isn’t that funny? If you have perceived
weaknesses blame your ancestors. (He’s smart like that.) ;)
Present day; tonight actually, I had a glimpse of that magic. While watching a movie with my husband I
heard something in the distance. At
first it sounded like the background noise from the movie. It was soft crying which didn’t fit and it
sounded too much like our youngest. I
had him pause the movie and I went in to check on her. She’s been running a fever the last few days
and though she acts fine during the day, at night things start to hurt; her
throat, her head, just a tough time. So
I went in to her room and noticed that both her sister and brother were still
fast asleep. How was that possible? But then daddy didn’t hear it either. It’s like that cry was meant just for me.
I crept in the room trying not to wake the others and start
the bedtime routine over, but 70-year old wood floors aren’t made for
creeping. By the time I got to her side
of the bed and my eyes had adjusted to the darkness I notice her stuffed animal
beside the bed so I placed it back in her arms.
She squeezed it to her chest, never opening her eyes, yet still
crying. So sad to hear and see. I repositioned the covers and pulled the
comforter up to her chin and her sisters, still the sad crying. So I did what any mom would do, I brushed her
hair off her forehead, used my lips to check for fever (there was none) and I
gave her a kiss followed by a soft whisper in the ear that I loved her.
Before I could straighten up she had stopped crying. And the other two, whom I hadn’t noticed
before shifting and moving, had stopped.
The room was silent except for the slow spin of the ceiling fan and the
soft breathing of three kids. It was
magic. Not the silence we parents plead
for after a long day of yelling and fighting, but the kiss. One simple kiss on a forehead followed by a reassuring
whisper of I love you and the room stilled.
When I went back in to the kitchen to let my husband know
all was well and to take the hot tea he had made me I relayed the story. I ducked my head behind my hair when the
tears started to fill my eyes. “There
are so many days I think the stress of raising kids is too much. And then God sends me a reminder that the
rewards outweigh the work.”
In our kitchen there is a sign that reads: “We do not
remember days, we remember moments.” This
will be a moment I remember. The day
wasn’t special, what I was doing before and after I will quickly forget, but that
moment when I realized that a simple kiss and whispered I love you held magic in the
eyes of my daughter… that will be a moment I hold on to forever.
This is beautiful! You had a wonderful moment! Thank you so much for sharing and reminding all of us to appreciate the small and simple!
ReplyDeleteSome days we over look those moment. I know I do daily. I need to stop that. Thanks for stopping by. :)
Deletethis is beautiful Christine and you have a beautiful family. The kids are so lucky to have you and Tommy. Thanks for sharing this special moment.
DeleteI started to tear up when I read the last line of your dad's poem and then just let them fall as I finished your story. Beautiful! Love moments like that!!
ReplyDeleteI miss our recliner moments. Love and miss you friend. :)
DeleteBeautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Thank you for sharing it!
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading. :) *I'm wearing glasses today because my eyes are still puffy. ;)
DeleteThat's so sweet! I don't have kids, and most of the time when I read Mommy blogs I don't know if I'll ever be ready for them. But this? This just made it sound like parenting might be more than the ceaseless chaos it appears to be from the outside. :)
ReplyDeleteThis might be the single best comment I’ve ever gotten.
DeleteThere are so many 'bitch blogs' and heaven knows I'm amening them right along with most of the other mom's, but last night I was hit with the reminder that kids really, truly are blessings and not burdens.
Oh Christine, this is so beautiful. Thanks for sharing your moment. As mothers, we really do live for these moments. <3
ReplyDeleteYes we do. :)
DeleteThis is simply one of the most beautiful things I ever read. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteChristine, so many times we laugh at the misadventures of our "shared" lives, we have questioned the same things at the same time, we have agreed about the difficulties of raising twins and singles, we have shared stories of the tiniest triumphs, and I love the laughs you've given me. This story brought tears to my eyes, I find we are so similar at times, I spend so much time in a day waiting for the crazy to end, that I don't slow down to enjoy the beauty of those tiny moments. Thank you for sharing this, I lost my dad 3 years ago, so not only did you give me 1 moment of magic, you gave me 2. All my love always Jennifer G
ReplyDelete